Funny Love Sayings

I found  The Love Quotes Encyclopedia while randomly surfing and and I was hooked. They have literally thousands of witty, humorous and really funny love quotes on all aspects of love and relationships. And there are many sources quoted not only famous authors but also movies, songs and other parts of popular culture. If you have had your share of relationships and had experienced the ups and downs of love and romance, you will find a gem here..

Follows are some interesting selections that I really liked:

If men can run the world, why can’t they stop wearing neckties? How intelligent Is it to start the day by tying a little noose around your neck? (LINDA ELLERBEE )

Every time I date a man I think: Is this the man I want my children to spend their weekends with?  (RITA RUDNER )

Romance is dead, It was acquired in a hostile take over between Hallmark and Disney, harmonized and sold off piece by piece. (From the TV show THE SIMPSONS)

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe!  (JACKIE MASON )

Human conception typically involves a chaotic dash by tens of millions of sperm seeking a path to a single egg. Some researchers believe that so many sperm are required because not one of them will stop to ask for directions! (MURPHY’S LAWS OF SEX)

In Oxford, Ohio, it’s illegal for a woman to strip off her clothing while standing in front of a man’s picture. (UNKNOWN AUTHOR)

Gwen: If you ever need a kidney, you’re welcome to one of mine! Terri: Of course, your kidney would make my other kidney do all the work, but that’s sweet. (From the movie FIRED UP)

Jay is helping Sam get back into the dating scene. Sam: What is Tiramisu? Jay: You’ll find out. Sam: Well, what is it? Jay: You’ll see! Sam: Some woman is gonna want me to do it to her and I’m not gonna know what it is! (From the movie SLEEPLESS IN SEATTLE)

Sow your wild oats on Saturday night Then on Sunday pray for crop failure (MURPHY’S LAWS FOR SEX)

Oh Moon! When I look on thy beautiful face, Careering along through the boundaries of space, The question has frequently come to my mind, If ever I’ll gaze on thy glorious behind!  (UNKNOWN AUTHOR)

Judy: Let me tell you something, kid. Love means never having to say you’re sorry. Howard: That is the stupidest thing I’ve ever heard in my life. (From the movie WHAT’S UP DOC?)

Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your heart or burn down your house, you can never tell (JOAN CRAWFORD )

FRIEND: A member of the opposite sex in your acquaintance who has some flaw which makes sleeping with him/her totally unappealing.  (THE DICTIONARY OF DATING)

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