Be Quick to Listen and Slow to Speak – You are the Most Important Person in the World to Me

“Be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry” is a very old saying and something that  in the  modern world of technology is frequently neglected  in our relationships. We have almost come to the stage where we find it easier  to interact more  through  our computers than with real relationships. The constant need for immediate responses  to our problems  and challenges  means that we are gradually  loosing the know how to effectively  relate  with the ones we love.

After a long  day at work or when you have finished looking after the children the best present you are able to  give to the person  you love is to listen, that’s spot on I did write listen! Make time for both of you to have   a few moments   “us’ time, begin  with a straightforward question make it  uncomplicated  for example  “What was the best thing about your day?” it will allow  your partner the chance  to be open about their day, in contrast to the common “how was your day?” to which the reply will usually  be a single word – “Good”. In order that you can be  a good listener you should  ask open  questions that are unable to  be answered with a single word. Takes practice but the benefits  to your relationship are wonderful. 

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You should  be primarily a listener, that allows you to show your respect your partner views, remember that 90%  of communication between you is unspoken , in other words body language, your partner will quickly see that you are not actually listening to what they are saying. This will help to destroy  your relationship over time finally  reaching at the stage  when they say  “you never listen to what I have to say……”, or much  worse “you only listen when you want something…………..”

Never  interrupt them or try to finish their sentences for them, give them time, it is a little understood  fact that we can process words at a much faster rate than we can speak them, so just listen, be interested in what they say, put them first .

It is not important if your relationship is just beginning or  well established~ long standing}  the needs are the same to keep it together  is to listen to whatever your partner is saying about the things that are important to them, then make a reply only when you have finished listening  and understood what they said. Sounds very deep I know, but if make assumptions that you know  what they mean without listening properly and give an incorrect response then follow it with the worst put down – ‘I thought that’s what you meant……….”, will get you into a lot of trouble. Neglect things now and you may well end up asking how to get my ex back

Listening is such a small thing to offer your partner, but over the  years I have found that one of the most prevelant  relationship problems  is frequently signaled, in  a relationship advice session, when one or other of them says “She/he never listens to a thing I say………………”, which almost always  means  that when  they communicate  they do not give each other time to listen, you know the “two ears, two eyes & one mouth” thing, means speak once listen and look twice .

Whatever age we are we all of us of us want  to know that our partner wants to listen to  what we have to say and show us the respect we need  by listening, it can about anything  for example, their opinion on the latest film/game/book/TV show/what happened in their day ……..the list can be never ending and it is frequently  trivial stuff but they need  to share it with YOU, all you have to do is to LISTEN.

Keep you love for each other young by talking daily  and most importantly LISTENING to what the other has to say, Successful communication allows for  a successful relationship – understand? For more advice how to get your ex back

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