Interracial internet dating, like most interactive internet activities, is riddled with scammers, people whose sole purpose in life is to separate you from your money . However, if you follow some pretty simple rules of safety, find a quality website that focuses on introducing Chinese women to Western men and goes to great lengths to protect you from the scammers, then merely use some common sense, you can meet Chinese women of a quality you’ve only dreamed of until now. You can focus on meeting your Chinese life mate and you won’t have to care about getting scammed.
The first thing you should do is create a long term plan. Do not get in a rush. I can’t tell you how many men actually propose to the first Chinese woman they meet online, before they’ve even met her in person. That is insane! Relax, kick back and settle in to really enjoy the fun of online dating and meeting lots of beautiful Sino women, who, unlike “emancipated” Western women, actually want you, want to be with you, want to take care of you. How many times lately have you met a woman who genuinely “wanted to take care of you”? Well on a quality Chinese dating website you have a great chance to meet lots of them.
Your job isn’t to meet a sole Chinese woman who’s amenable to marry you as fast as conceivable. Just the opposite, your job is meeting Chinese women in droves who are looking for a find a western lifemate. Then, out of all those Chinese woman who want to be your lifemate, to weed out the Chinese girl who matches you best . You can’t do that in a hurry ! Nor should you, because this step can be a lot of fun .
The plan is as follows:
1. Decide when in the future you’ll make that trip to China, because eventually you’ll have to do that to meet in person the several great China ladies you’ve narrowed your list of real potential lifemates down to. Don’t plan on having them come to you. The cost and stress of hosting 3 to 5 Chinese female guests for several weeks each will be far more than you going to China to meet them, and this way you get a great trip out of the deal. Plus, if you’re in China you can simply instantly escape any Chinese woman who is not what you were expecting, instead of being stuck entertaining her for the entire time she’s in your country.
You should make it between 3 to 9 months from the date you start your internet dating adventure to the date you arrive in China. Anything less than 3 months is too soon to have met enough women of China and shortlisted the very best of them. Anything longer than 9 months is going to seem like too long to them to wait to finally meet you.
2. Put together a really great profile. Read Dating Tips and articles in your site’s online dating section and eMagazine on this subject. (If your international online dating site doesn’t offer this advice why is it your favorite?) Then take the time to make your profile one that will really be of interest to the Chinese ladies.
3. Begin sorting through the many thousands of pretty Chinese women that should be available on your Chinese dating website for the ones who are most attractive to you as lifemates . Don’t dwell on the ones who look like they’d hit the hay with you on a minute’s notice, because they probably would – you and about a hundred other guys. Look for real China women who are seeking a lifemate, not a customer.
4. Make contact. In my opinion your first contact should be only a Kiss even if you or she is a VIP member. You don’t want to seem desperate or over anxious. If she doesn’t respond follow up with a short message about a week later. NEVER send a great big long biography of yourself in the first message. You’ll bore her to tears. Keep it short and fun. Make her want to know more .
5. Send out lots of opening kisses, but only to Chinese girls who are of real interest to you. The number of replies you receive will surpise you if you’re on a real quality site, and you don’t need to get bogged down writing letters and chatting with ladies who you knew beforehand were not real match material for you.
6. Once you start communicating with some of the members be careful. As much effort as a quality site extends to eliminate scammers there are always some who get past the barriers and don’t get caught until a member reports them. On that note, the moment anyone asks you for money, no matter how sincere and reasonable it seems, report them to your website’s service department and expect them to investigate and advise you of their conclusions. If there isn’t a clear and responsible ongoing effort by the website to limit scammers, change websites and find one where there is.
7. Now, ready and focused get out there and meet that beautiful Chinese woman who is your perfect Chinese lifemate. After all, Chinese women turn dreams into reality.
John Abbot is co-owner of ChinaLoveMatch.net. Married to a lovely Chinese Lady and living in China, John knows and respects China, Chinese Women, Chinese People and Chinese Culture. He blogs about Online Dating, Chinese Women, International Relationships and Things Chinese.